I-am-not-a-robit

well life has taken on a rather tiring cycle. School, play practice, three hours at home for homework etc. WEEKEND PLX. PLX. It's sort of self inflicted though, that I'm in the play. but it's too late to quit. i wish some of my friends were in it though some people are nice. but it makes me feel all anti-social loserish. I am so tired I want to die, or wait... I want to sleep! what a concept!

So yeah. There's not much to post about because it's not actually like I've had time do some something fun, that I wanted to do, that made me happy or was cool in any way. Except for like lunch, but i'm not going to post about lunch because that would be lame and all of you were already there. Three more weeks!

Oh! because we have masks in the play we don't have to wear any eye makeup! I don't get to look scary! (but i don't have to go through pain and suffering trying to get it off :D) But the base costume he is describing sounds like a ninja costume. which is fine with me. And I get leafy things to wear for being a dryad. Is wearing leafy things worth 6th o'clock rehearsals? You guessed it, no.

I hate a-days
I hate wednesdays.
I hate weekdays.
I hate school.
I hate everything.
EXCEPT...!

My plans for my future cottage/house! (Sorry i got really bored when I was sick and stared at the beautiful cottage paintings in my room for the longest time.) Okay I admit that a cottage isn't very realistic. Nor is being transported back a century or two. SO. to keep up with the times I'm more thinking of an almost equally awesome art studio/house. Thinking as in being bored in math and having a wandering mind... But I'll miss my imaginary loom and herb garden :( God this is sort of sad considering I'll probably end up in some suburban home with a minivan and screaming babies and no art studios or 12 acres of woods to speak of. But one can always hope!

Speaking of which I decided my ultimate goal in life is to be able to paint as well as "Eva". I just realized while I stared that there's an obvious signature in the corner of the cottage paintings. It just says "Eva". so now Eva is totally my H. They are AMAZING. I wonder who Eva is... (tried google search, but she's not that well known.)

So yeah, sleep... wake up... repeat.

I haz plague.

More like the most vicious common cold. I have some much work to do! It's really hard to do math when I'm really spacey, have hellish asthma, it hurts to swallow and talk, have to blow my nose literally ever minute etc. But I managed to do a lot of my homework yesterday some how. Today I hope to go to school at like 9:30 and skip play practice, so then I only have to be there like 5.5 hours. that's not too long to suffer. Sigh. I wish I could breathe. At least I don't have much of a fever any more.

weekend tomorrow! YES. Sleep! more slowly dying in my bed all day! More time to do homework! Yay? And maybe i'll even get better.

City of Ember

I saw City of Ember today. TWAS EXCELLENT. like really, usually they positively ruin books when they make them into movies but this is a glaring exception. It was really good!

Things that matched with the book that I really loved or just perfect details:
-Lina and Doon were perfect! Lina wasn't too fashy, she looked just how I pictured her. Doon was different than I thought, but he worked really well. For a while i thought he looked too old, but you get used to it. sometimes he reminded me more of Zane, but it's probably because of the similarity in plot, they're both have the grim determination of trying to escape from a city where it is illegal to try to leave. and they both run around with their "girlfriends in the loosest sense of the world" trying to find a way out. Wow never realized the similarity till now.

- The city itself was really perfect. It had the perfect old quality and warm colors. The people and the clothes both had a really perfect feel.

-The whole apocalyptic feeling was definitely there. Like the movie took the doomsday feeling from the book and magnified it really well. One thing that would have been awesome is if when the power went out it was actually dark I know, totally bizarre. Well I get that it actually needs to be light so you can see what the characters are doing. But it would have been really cool to just have a moment of complete darkness. Plus the coolest part ever was when Doon saw the generator. It was probably about 10 times taller and worse than I pictured in the book, which was a cool surprise. Plus it was on fire!!! People were running all over and had fire hoses! soo cool! Like the movie took everything right from my mind but made it cooler! (And on fire!!)

But the weird part was that they added enormous rats with feelers instead of eyes. um. okay. gross.

So I could go on and on about all of the awesome stuff that they added that I was glad they did but I will refrain myself. Well I sort of did.

MEA yay but i have so much to do. it's not even funny. sigh.

In other news, I don't think my life sucks as much as it did in my last post. but that's not hard to do.

I want to draw something/somebody but i'm not sure who. I've pretty much worn out the characters from my stories. i'll just have to draw people from books I read. because of course i've never done that before. >_> You can probably expect another batch of people with wings! considering I'm listening to Falcondance. I just realized that I started the Keisha'ra series in the fall of 7th grade! And have read them every fall since then. I'm a creature of routine i guess o.O I'm starting to memorize parts of Falcondance by accident. I guess it's easier to memorize books when I hear them.

Worst. Day. Ever.

Maybe not literally because the first half was almost normal suck rating.

So I come home at 5:20, which leaves me about 4-5 hours to cut out pictures for my collage, write my labels and edit my bubble map and glue it all down. Also studying for my math quiz, health test and spanish test. EEK. major eek. Then half way through gluing down my collage the phone rings. it was my neighbor saying that their dog had to be put down because she had a big tumor. Aaaugh! nooo! I barely was able to hang up the phone before I broke down. and then lilly didn't make it any easier because she has this cute instinct that I want to be licked all over my face when I'm crying (she's just in it for the salt). Which made me more like "dogs! nooo!" I had to do my collage (eye-roll) for a half an hour before I could calm down but then I actually didn't, because just picking up the phone to call maren made me crack again. All in all, when I did call I hope I didn't make it worse, great friend I am. I couldn't quite find the "comforting and strong" voice at that moment in time.

AAAAAAA! WHY.

Whenever I have bucket loads to do there always has to be something that just makes it that much harder. (last time i spilled cereal all over) this is worse than the cereal incident by like infinite.

incomparably, now I have to redo my econ assignment, we got playing tests assigned in band, a new government project and plenty of physics.

plus a headache. maybe I should take something.

Well

EDIT: ZOMG INKDEATH IS OUT. NO WAE. NO WAE. I LIKE TOTALLY FORGOT. BUT I DON'T HAVE IT YET. OH THE PAIN AND SUFFERING. /wrists.

mixer was tonight. it was meh. like mostly i gave up on trying to follow people around because I usually ended up having no idea what people were talking about. But the end was cooler because we all ended up in a single location and I almost could do that thing where you spin the hat and put it on your head. yeah, major un-scyles right there. Then we got to go outside, which was awesome. but yeah, in all too many people and too loud which is really what i expected any way. but in all not much of a turnout which was fine with me. mostly everybody thought it was pretty lame it seemed like, but that's just me. Yet, on the way home my brother was blasting Neutral Milk Hotel which was the only good music I heard all night, so it was especially epic as it always is in the car. <NMH3. I think the mixer would be 10 times better if they had better music (my favorite music of course), it was outside if there was good weather, and um that's pretty much it. i don't know.

Blah i'm tired. and tired. meh.

The presidential debate, as usual wasn't much of a debate. It was them listing statistics that we've already heard like "did you know mccain voted for blah blah blah 79 times??!" or "obama meets with foreign tyrants unconditionally" which i am totally sick of!!! but saturday night live did a brilliant job as usual covering it.

Two days then MEA week and weekend. yayz. the fall colors are already causing me to be a leaf ninja (aka very covertly going a step into people's yards and stealing the prettiest of their leaves, oh the expensiveness of my crimes) so i have like a stack of leaves curling upstairs that I want to scan.

Yeah I have no inspiration for writing and everything I write makes me too sad to continue what ever story it is. like I can't write a story happy enough that it is worth writing. i just have a series of really depresso ideas that I could start. and my disturbing dreams aren't helping. like being part of a demonic ritual in which they were trying to put the dead bad guy (gal?)'s soul into my body. wow that would be some surprise for you guys at school. I'd be all like killing you. but you'd think that would be inspiration for my warlock story but not really. i'm just too uninspired and sad. I haven't done art since I scanned those leaves in and played with them on photo paint. and that's barely even art no matter how cool it ended up. Like i didn't really have to create something out of nothing. anyway i don't even have things that I want to make. for once. ugh.

i haven't even been to hallow tree.

sigh. life has condensed to homework. and school. No me gusta la vida. La vida es muy aburrida y no es simpatica. Yo quiero estar artistico y quiero leer y dormir. No me gusta la escuela. Y no quiero estar enferma. ¿el sigh? tengo sueno. Buena noche.

Complication

everything in life is so complicated and I don't even have to worry about taxes and insurance yet. think what life is like for wild animals. you sleep when you're tired. you eat when you're hungry. you run or fight when there's danger. We sleep when our homework is over and wake up to our alarms. we eat before we go to school, we have a 30 minute period to eat lunch. the most regular danger is failing a test in which case you can neither run nor fight. or even simpler, think of what life is like for a tree. You dig your roots in the ground, and grow towards the sun. not even primal instincts really to worry about. SIGH.

Not everything is bad. most things are bad. most things suck. (but it is fall <3)>_>. But none of you guys are annoying me, as always. This more directed to various other groups of people and people in general. God I must seem sort of manic. i'm always really serious or really happy.

Today at the pep fest just felt wrong. The large gathering of people seemed like unnatural in an indescribable way. It just made me think of the humongous population problem. And the mini-cheerleader prototypes... ummmm... good for them. Whatever it was that seemed wrong was gone at the football game today. Maybe being outside helped.

so yeah, night yall.