Bluuuugh

School is icktastic. Like really... When am I going to use this stuff in life?? Physics... transitive verbs... functions... Econ, Gov a bit of LA and Health are really the only things I think i might need and maybe not even though. Physics, like all of us, is eating away at my mind. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuughhh.
Plus it's warm out today, i mean, what's with that?

Last night i was a humongous wreck, like after six. I spilled my dinner (a big bowl of fiber-1 cereal and milk) all over my shoes, my backpack and the carpet right as I was thinking "Where the hell is my science notebook, I really need it," "I can't beleive I only have threeish hours to do infinite homework" "I have two quizzes tomorrow" "what is with all if this family coming into town suddenly?" "I have to memorize my marching band songs and I don't even know what the first note is" "I might have callbacks tomorrow so even less homework time and plenty of nerves." The spill was just like when you stretch and stretch a rubber band that is me and the spill was like a sharp knife coming down on that thin, stretched rubber band. I ended up crying over split milk (and my delicious fiber cereal dinner! that actually wasn't that delicious as soon as it combined with the carpet) I knew it wasn't a big deal at all, right, you just clean up the milk and cereal, make yourself a new bowl, bring your stuff upstairs, turn on the Pretties audiobook and do your physics, study of econ and government. But basically it felt like my whole life sucked, like really sucked, like the vacuum of space kind of sucking. like emptiness. void. Nothing. That feeling barely subsided long enough for me to get my physics homework done in like 2 hours and study both my econ and government quizzes in 20 minutes.

And then I started reading Peeps by my favorite author Scott Westerfeld before bed. BUT IT WAS SO SAD (got westerfeld is a master of his craft). Let me quote from it. Here is the last sentence that I could read before I had to stop "Sarah had lost everything, shedding the pieces of her life one by one to placate the anathema until she was left here in this dark place, clinging to the shuddering, rickety frame." And the frame refers to what used to be her favorite movie, where elvis sells pieces of his car until he only has a rickety frame left. you just have to read it. So there comes the sucky-ness again.

sighcraplifereallysucks. I've found sometimes you can measure misery in tissues. Last night got a whopping 17.

On a happierish note I went to the park to read in Hallow Tree and I found a hair binder in it that definitely was not mine! I asked the tree if he had been seeing other girls and he ignored me. that insensitive jerk. but i'm sure our relationship will get through this.